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How to defend yourself from envious people

It does not matter whether you are young and beautiful, adult and overweight, single or married, the only thing that matters is your personality, your skills, your charm and your smile.

This is what attracts the most envy from people who do not possess these characteristics. But who are envious people? Envious people are generally human beings without depth, always busy evaluating and judging the lives of others because evaluating their own would put them in serious difficulty. They may be lucky people, but they are so busy destroying the happiness of others that they cannot recognize there own.

They are people who are certainly fascinated by the “personalities of depth”, their successes, the intensity of their ties, their joy of living, but they are so pissed off to see in another being so much wonder that they spend most of their time and energy trying to destroy so much splendor.

They are only interested in what “thick personalities” have: work, friends, network etc… even if, before it was someone else’s property, they never considered it. Yes, that’s right, they just want what you “thick” have even if they don’t know what it is, it’s yours so they want it or, at least, they want to take it away from you.

I’ve met a few envious people in my life. What can I say! They have some characteristics in common, I have learned to recognize them and, consequently, to defend myself. I must say that women are the majority, but this “ugly evil” belongs to both sexes. Recognizing the “nasties” is easy once you get the hang of it. They generally have a half-hearted, half-smile, they shower you with compliments and try to get as much information as possible about you, your friends, your connections and your work. Once they have secured a front row seat in your life, they start to fight to become the absolute protagonist and, while fighting and fighting, they do damage left and right.

They will try to discredit you to the people you have introduced them to, they will concentrate terribly on wishing you to lose all the good things that are part of your life, they will orgasm if something in your life goes wrong. They are true monsters, capable of unprecedented cruelty. And, the bizarre news is that these monsters can be hidden under the guise of a partner, friend, colleague or even family member.

If you have a partner who, every now and then, tells you that you have gained weight, aged, that you dress badly, that your friends are horrible people etc… well, behind all this there is a monster, envy, gnawing at your being better than them and that they recognize you as such. Yes, because the envious person loves you, admires you, would like to be like you but does not think he/she is capable of it. The wonderful news is that these people are harmless to the extent that you want them to be. It is you who must decide whether to feed them and make them fierce or simply let them die of hardship making them harmless.

Personally, thanks to Buddhism and the passing of the years, I have learned to recognize them, push them away and render them helpless. It is enough not to fall into their trap, it is enough not to stop believing in yourself and in your own abilities, it is enough to think that they will be the victim of themselves without you doing anything to destroy them. When I realize that I have someone around me who resembles this archetype, as a good Buddhist, I wish them all the best, I push them away and I continue to be the person I have always been, sunny, serene and nice. It takes little, their Karma will do the rest.

Thank you. i love you.

Recommended track: “Che bella gente” Simone Cristicchi